~~Long lost best friend~~

I miss my best friend(s) . The one that I had and shared the same joys and tears during those good old days...

I wish one day I will receive a text message asking me 'How r u doing' or 'Hey let's hang out together since I'm around here' or 'Hello, I want to pay you a visit, and let's have a sip of coffee together'... while gossiping & laughing out loud on whatever topics that we choose to talk with... I wish I had one... But I never did... And I wonder if I ever had a best friend(s) before... :~(



********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Manusia makhluk Allah yang pelik~~

Yes, including myself, mmg terkadang ada perangai pelik, tp berusaha tak menyusahkan dan menyakiti hati org dengan perangai pelik tu. But there are some people yg perangai pelik yang menyakitkan hati org. Expect orang faham semua benda. Layan manusia lain mcm dia sorang ja betul kt dunia, play innocent, buat orang lain macam tunggul kayu/dinding, but the next meeting dgn org yg sama, buat2 mcm xda benda yg berlaku. And this thing keep on repeating again & again. This kind of person is a hypocrite person, or would I  say munafik? Yeah a bit harsh I guess, but that's the fact. Sampai diri sendiri confused, dia ni nak apa sebenaqnya dari aku, *sigh*. Dah tak larat nak bersangka baik & husnuzon, penat!!!

Expect orang kena layan dia baik2 tp dia sendiri not doing the same towards other people. Hey, wake up la!! Respect is to be earned, you'll not get it easy peasy just like that. And dont make assumption, u're older  then you should have all the priorities / respect in the world, so pathetic. Use your brain, jangan la pentingkan perasaan sendiri ja, learn to appreciate other people. *sigh* kat sini ja boleh luah, selain menangis meratap pada Allah swt, dah lama sangat simpan dalam hati. Boleh memaafkan, but I will never forget what you've done to me all these past years, NEVER. And I dont care anymore what will you say about me after this, lantak lah nak jadi apa pun. And I am happy to keep a distance from you, as a precaution sebelum betul2 jadi gila... Moga Allah swt kurniakan ketenangan yg berpanjangan buat hambaNya yg hina ni :( , and moga Allah ampunkan dosaku sbb post benda ni, but that's how I feel as an ordinary person, just to feel relieve a bit. Aamiin InsyaAllah

********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Positive VS Negative~~

Assalamua'laikum , 

2 tahun... 

Dah lama tak menulis, hati tersentuh pagi ni, sedih...  tiba² menangis sendu, and yes I couldnt get it out of my mind. 

Dalam hidup ni, yess semua orang berusaha untuk berada dalam keadaan positif, husnuzon kata orang. Tapi dalam mencapai 100% positif kena letakkan beberapa % ke arah negatif. 

Sebab apa? Sebab hidup xkan selalunya indah. Ujian dan cabaran dr Allah swt akan datang tanda kasih sayangNya pada kita. 

So, apa perlu kita buat? Prepare for the worst case scenario. Dan tgk real life case scenarios . Sediakan payung sebelum hujan. 

Bukan meletakkan kebergantungan kepada undang-undang & hukum Allah swt semata-mata.  Peka dengan alam sekeliling. Fahami fitrah kejadian manusia, yang hatinya sentiasa berbolak balik, Astaghfirullah hal'aziim....

Sebenarnya persediaan itu sendiri berlandaskan hukum Allah swt, Allah dah beri jalan yg memudahkan, tp sbb sayang dan percaya/yakin 100% pada manusia yg hatinya berbolak balik, ada org tak faham, xnak faham & tak mahu terima kenyataan , nak 100% positif sahaja, klu boleh 200% kot... Wallahua'lam... Tak mahu langsung fikir consequences,  kemungkinan yang bakal berlaku.

Trust me xdak sesiapa pun di dunia ni mahu perkara buruk berlaku dalam hidup masing². Tapi klu Allah swt dah kata 'kun fayakun' , maka di situlah kita harus bersedia.. 

Tak mampu dah nak suarakan apa² lagi, biarlah. Simpan saja dalam hati, Allah lebih mengetahui... Dan sesungguhnya Allah swt sebaik-baik pelindung... 

********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

Post number two 2016

Percaya atau tidak, orang yang kau anggap paling rapat dengan kau, orang itulah yang paling tidak menjaga perasaan kau, yang take for granted apa yang kau luahkan semua rasa yang terbuku di hati, umpama masuk telinga kanan keluar telinga kiri... *sigh*  Ya Allah, pemilik hati yang berbolak balik, pelihara & tabahkan hatiku...~tears~

********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

Post number one 2016

Alhamdulillah,  I'm a mother of three now.  Yes,  gave birth to a healthy  baby girl a week ago,  to be exact on 14th September 2016. Emergency C-sec,  that's it.  Don't ask why. Bilamana Allah telah berkehendakkan seperti yg Dia mahu,  siapa kita untuk menidakkannya.

Allah,  Allah, Allah,  penatnya hari ni.  Sumpah  penat,  penat sampai menangis.  Orang akan  cakap,  alah biasalah baru lepas  bersalin mmg penat  camni. Penat yang penat,  perit  perut kena toreh  still terasa, jalan 6-7 langkah pun  rasa  jauhnya, Allah ja yang tau...

Post ni bukan nk merungut, jauh sekali nk menyesal.  Just luahan rasa,  sbb tatau nk cerita  kt sapa.  If only he knows that I need a support  more than anyone else right now,  even more than anybody at a hospital... *tears*tears*tears*.... Hmm,  xpa lah,  Allah ada,  if there's no one here for me to cling on,  serahkan semua pada Allah, merintih la padaNya, InsyaAllah Dia mendengar & Dia  akan menjaga, no matter  what,  InsyaAllah.


********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Online Seller Yg Sombong~~

Haven't wrote anything here for quite sometime, but tonight I will. Azidah Collection, take note that label. The seller of this online business is so pathetic arrogant. Luckily I haven't bought anything from this seller, Alhamdulillah. Of all online seller, never thought I would bump into this big-headed seller. Hmmm...

Yang kat atas & berjaya tak akan selalu berada di atas....you'll be upside down kalau mula lupa diri & bongkak,  just remember that....


*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~...... :( ~

Dont expect too much, or you will hurt, lesson learned. I shoud have gone to the office as usual but I didnt.
Yesterday was supposed to be my happy day, but it wasnt, except for the movie time with the kids. Nothing extraordinary or special. In fact, I slept with a broken heart lastnight *tears*...
********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Sakit~~

I just dont get it! Bab nak g berseronok apa bagai boleh pulak berdikari. Bila sampai bab tanggungjawab diri sendiri orang lain plak kena take over. Tatau la nk masuk kategori minta tolong ka atau manja tak bertempat! Hmmm... Serously tatau nak kata apa, sabar lah duhai hati... Allahuakhbar!!!

********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Monday blues~~

After 5 years, yet he still didnt know what is my favourite part of the chick.. Hmmm... Ok mood kurang elok this morning, da!!

#thankyouAllahfortherezqi


********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Saturday bluess...~~

Thought going for a jog this evening, but then it's raining heavily, hmmpphh, it's ok then. Just started consuming green tea as a first step to lose weight :). Hey it's not too bad u know.

And it's a cooking day as well today. Been cooking since noon - nasi daging, dalca and air asam for lunch. Ans crab fritters for 'kudap2'. Next (maybe tonight) is sugar cookies wt royal icing on top :), hih! Wish me luck!! Ok, to be cont... Da!!


********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Hmmpphhh, yes I knew it!!!~~

It's tend to be ... or more to ... what you want, it's not that you really need it I think. Might take some time to accept it, really....********************************************************* When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~ Sometimes ~~

Sometimes you just don't need a shoulder to cry on, whenever nobody is willing to listen your story or understand your feelings. You just need to cry a river to yourself as long as you want and that your heart feels relieved. I know HE is always with me.

*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~I'm ok with it~~

I've decided not to go to Istanbul just because of my kids, especially the little one. It's kinda sad and I know it's a once in a lifetime chance to go there for free (yes, everything is sponsored). Someone may think that it's unwise decision for not accepting the offer, but I'd rather stay at home with my little boy and girl  than being worried and missing my kids all the time during the trip. It's ok, I believe in Allah SWT's planning and fate. Don't worry be happy (^-^)... everything happened for a reason.

*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~TQ hubby *kisses*~~

Craving for caramel frappe, I can wait till tomorrow, but hubby insisted to go out and bought it for me tonight, I mean it's already close to 11 pm... sobsss... tearssss.... tq so much hubby :), love u, muaahhssss

p/s : I'm 40 wks and 1 days of pregnancy, yet the baby gives no sign of coming out (#-_-)
*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Sabar~~

Ingat duduk umah bley rest and dpt peace of mind, lagi serabut otak ada la dgn budak2 ni :(, sabarlah hati...

*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Pasti...~~

Aku diam tak bermakna aku salah. Alhamdulillah, tu jer yang mampu aku lafazkan dalam hati sambil tersenyum. Aku takkan rendahkan diri aku semata-mata nak bertelagah & bertikam lidah dengan orang macam kau. Kalau tak dapat balasan di dunia, aku percaya Allah akan balas setiap perbuatan dan perkataan kau di akhirat nanti. Balasan Allah itu pasti.......

*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Sedih~~

Tiba-tiba rasa sedih, rasa nak nanges puas2 sampai hati rasa lega & tenang. O Allah, hanya padaMu aku berserah....... 


*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Today~~

Today  badan dah rasa ok, even rasa sengal sakit belakang still ada. But I'm getting better I guess compare to few days back. Terkelepek atas katil macam lempeng.

Owh, manage to masak2 today, bubur lambuk & 2 big trays of pizza, hih!!! Alhamdulillah.... Still have a lot work to be finished, lipat bajuuuu.... sobbssss... and kemas bilik... sobssssssss.... okie, ta!

*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Life is as it should be~~

It's been a while...... How's life? As usual.... hectic, tiring...  plus the pressure is even more now. But somehow,  I should be thankful for all the life have brought me through :).

Good news, Imtiyaaz is gonna be a big brother soon, end of this year, Insya Allah. Bad news. I've gone through a quite bad morning sickness + nausea. And I'm getting used to it now, it slowly faded away as I reached 2nd trimester of my pregnancy. Cant really wait to hold a small little baby again (^-^)

Work... hurmmm work, the 'pressure is even more now' is referred to work actually. Thought of finding other job, cause sometimes I just couldn't stand it anymore, I just couldn't bear the workload, the responsibilities and the fact that I have to handle A-Z all by myself. Maybe I need to take a month leave and rest at home without thinking about work, owh how I wish I could do that.

Hmmm, ok , keyboard off for now. Got something else to do. Ta!!

*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.

~~Nangis sendiri~~

Benar apa yang selalu orang cakap, salah yang sedikit itu selalunya lebih di ingati dari kebaikan yang banyak,

Atau, memang tidak ada hatta sekelumit kebaikan kah yang aku buat selama ini?

Negatif menguasai positif,

Aku bukan robot, yang langsung tak ada hati dan perasaan,

Aku bukan gadget pintar, yang boleh di padam segala data buruk yang ada di dalamnya,

Aku hanya manusia, manusia biasa yang banyak kekurangan,

Yang tak mampu buat semua perkara,

Yang hanya tumpang bernafas di bumi Allah SWT ini, hanya untuk seketika,

Terpaksa telan walaupun pahit.......

Terpaksa memendam rasa walaupun sebu di dada.........

Menangis sendiri, mengeluh sendiri, Ya Allah, tabahkan hatiku........

*********************************************************
When you lose your way, to Allah you should turn.